I've stayed home the past two days. I've done some cleaning, which is good, but mostly done nothing. I've isolated. I'm lonely. I can't get going.
I came home early from backpacking, so I had no structure to the rest of my vacation- and I can't get myself together. All that will change Monday morning, when life gets back to normal, but until then I am off.
I have plans for tomorrow- but I didn't keep my plans for today. I don't know if it makes sense to even have them. Will I get myself going?
I need a certain amount of structure, I know that. And I am also disappointed in my trip. And now disappointed in myself, my life. I'm not good left to my own devices for too long. I do need my down time, my alone time, but there has to be a limit to it. And I have passed that limit.
I am diligently doing my light therapy, so hopefully I have the seasons thing under control, as much as it ever is.
I just have to get myself to overcome this inertia. I need to get out of my apartment tomorrow. Walk or hike. Go to church. Visit my dad. Go grocery shopping. Those are all good plans. All doable. I just have to do it, and get out of bed.