Anyway, after a rough morning I was really crashing, and realized that I had been on a slow crash for a while. I fled to my car at lunch. I felt like I was shutting down, I couldn't think or focus- no energy. I wanted to curl up into a ball. No, I didn't cry. But I did pull out my spare meds (I keep an extra day's meds in my purse), and take an Effexor pill. I'm going up on the effexor again, I had to do something. I couldn't let things keep going like this. But as it turns out, at the huge dose that I take effexors, it really has a little bit of a kick to it with all it's norepinephrine and dopamine effect from the higher dose. So, I didn't have to wait the 3 weeks it takes me with antidepressants usually to get an effects- I had a little bit of almost instantaneous brightening. Enough to get me though the day.
Hopefully that kick won't fade too quickly. I'm going to need it in the coming days, I think.
Maybe tomorrow will be better. It is at least a Friday. Although I did decide to skip Friday' yoga class. I'll go on Monday, I hope I will be healed enough to go then. But I do have good things planned for the weekend. I am getting a massage, a pedicure, and going to a drumming circle. I haven't had a pedicure in 2 years. I want to get one before it gets too cold. I want to get a really cool color polish, too.